Putting It All Together (04.23.2006)

As we finish the unit on Honesty, review the lessons from the past couple of months:

HONESTY IS A GIFT – Luke 14:7-14; Mark 6:34
Honesty focuses on the truth. It cares for people by helping them see something they do not understand. It focuses on how people are hurting themselves or others.

LIVING WITHOUT MASKS – John 1:43-48; Matthew 20:20-21, 22:15-18; Luke 11:37-45, 53-54
Jesus values forthrightness. A hypocrite is a person who lacks integrity. People with integrity are the same on the inside as they are on the outside – even if the inside is not perfect!

GOOD ANGER – Matthew 12:9-14; Mark 3:1-6; Luke 6:6-11
Two factors determine anger’s appropriateness: cause and effect. In Mark 3:4-6, Jesus’ anger results from His grieving for the Pharisees’ hard hearts toward the man with the shriveled hand.

GOOD IRRITATION & RAGE – Mark 10:13-16, 11:15-18; Matthew 10:34
Jesus’ irritation is a response to how others are treated. He acts to correct the situation, letting go of irritation. His rage is others-centered, resulting from compassion or faith being blocked, and always resulting in positive action.

A TIME TO SHUT UP – Mark 14:27-31, 14:66-72; John 13:36-14:1
We often feel a need to respond to everything a person says that’s incorrect. Jesus teaches us that we do not have to have the last word. We should offer our honesty as a gift, knowing that it is not our task to make them understand.

HONESTY IS PATIENT – Matthew 18:21-35; Mark 9:2-8; John 21:1-8
Jesus quietly overlooks Peter’s personality flaws. Forbearance, the act of overlooking someone else’s sin, is the “grease” for relationships. Through forbearance, compassion controls honesty.

RECONCILIATION – Matthew 7:1-5; John 8:2-11
Balancing honesty and compassion begins by looking at our own faults, then approaching the other person. If we merely try to understand, we’re too passive. If we’re merely honest, we’ll be judgmental.

LOVE YOUR ENEMIES – Matthew 5:38-48; Romans 12:14, 17-21
Jesus encourages thoughtful loving. We’re to help people where they are weak and needy. Jesus calls on us to not be passive in response to enemies. We should overwhelm them with love at their point of need. Love protects us from our enemies.

PRUDENCE – Matthew 5:23-24, 5:38-44, 7:6, 10:16, 10:26, 13:24-30; John 2:23-25; Mark 10:10
Reconciliation is the rule. Loving silence when relating to enemies is the exception to the rule. We don’t stop loving difficult people; we love them differently. We switch from words to deeds and give the person a little space.

PUTTING IT ALL TOGETHER
Read the following scenarios at your tables. Which lessons about honesty apply to each situation? How would you demonstrate honesty – as Christ did – if you found yourself in that situation? More than one lesson may apply to each – and there are no “right” answers.

When discussing each scenario, think of how you would respond – not just the expected “Sunday school” answer. Also, feel free to make assumptions about the other person to make it relevant to you.

SCENARIO #1: A colleague from work lives with his significant other. Recently, he shared with you that they are expecting, but that their relationship is strained. He is not sure what to do about the situation and has indicated that he might be open to advice.

SCENARIO #2: Your next-door neighbor is a nice person, but he is definitely living a worldly life. In a brief conversation one day, he boasts about all the late nights spent either at work trying to get ahead or at clubs trying to find a woman. Recently, you have found empty beer cans and cigarette butts in your yard and driveway.

SCENARIO #3: A colleague of yours is a workaholic, doing all she can to move up the corporate ladder. Over the past year, she has taken credit for some of your ideas, and you have witnessed her lying to your boss. The boss has fallen for her “act” and continues to reward your colleague more than you.

SCENARIO #4: A friend of yours from church has struggled for years with a particular sin – one that is mostly a mere annoyance to others, but can sometimes become a true wedge between him and your circle of friends. Lately, you’ve seen it become a wedge more often than usual.

SCENARIO #5: Your sister recently accepted the Lord and is excited about her new life in Him. Her husband, however, is not a believer and discourages her “new found religion” in a variety of ways – making derogatory and mocking comments, not allowing her to go to a Bible study across town, and even scheduling weekend trips so she’ll have to miss church. A family event is coming up this weekend, so you are sure to run into your sister and brother-in-law.